Words by Taylor Godber - Originally posted on taylorgodber.blogspot.ca
Hating on the haters? A possible product of having spent the better part of the previous 8 years of my life in Whistler. Awareness of being jaded, check! I have calcified a serious backbone. Not quiet steel yet, but Im working on it. A continual battle to not a give a f#ck what others think of me, how they have classified me, how I do or do not fit their Rx archetype. At the end of the day, I guess at times I still do care a little too much.
A couple of friends moved to whistler this year. They are 2 of the most level headed, open minded, accepting, amazing people that I have ever met in my life. They had a rough go this winter. They brought to light some facts about the closed arms and cold evil stares of whistler. A disposition that we are all conscious of, but choose to evade. Whistler along with any town that is saturated with marketing, media, and sales in the sports industry is sinful of.
Everyone’s business is everyone else's duty.
Its a destination where it seems to matter what you wear, who you are friends with, what you do in the day or after the bars are closed. You are classified and you are put under a magnifying glass. A glass that examines you with assumption versus evidence. A scrupulous blind autopsy that obviously misses the actuality of what is being presented. Its sad. Its rough. Its lame. Simple. Some will crumble in their own skin and try to fit in by pleasing what others might want to see. Others will get tired of the judgmental antics and leave.
It is in our nature to analyze. I am the first to say that the gut instinct of yours is so very important to roll with. However, it seems as if the idea of being naturally intuitive and poisonously judgmental are so very different.
This rant has long been embedded into my brain. Searching for liberation since the fantastically excepting days of high school. It is a cup that has been overfilled trickling down the side to the floor and sometimes rushing down like a river. The means of release sparked by a blog entry from a role model, my 200hr yoga teacher trainer Julia McCabe http://hongkongyogiratpackboom.blogspot.ca/2013/04/mindfulness-dontgiveashitfullness-two.html
The idea of not giving a sh#t and being mindful. Two of many mantras that I try to live by. Two of which I regularly struggle with. How to be yourself and search through trial and error, who you want to be without caring what others think? Being able to cool the jets when you are challenged by others as to your decisions. Constantly cross-examined by the universe. Successively growing.
I sit here in Fort McMurray struggling to stay charged. Drained in the sense that my ability to be mindful while dealing with particular drunken, close minded people is wearing thin. I have only been here for a week. Not to mention the air pollution, lack & withdrawal from the majestic aura of the mountains and the purity of the ocean, and arduous headaches that us B.C. folk endure. 37 days to go, countdowns are essential here.
About a year ago I got a tattoo on my right forearm. An amendment to how I would like to live my life in a sense. I chose its permanent home as to be steadily reminded of its ethical meanings. In doing so have put it in plain sight of all to see. It is most definitely a conversation starter, an opener to speculation with positive and negative tastes left with those brave and curious enough to ask what it means. A brief description of each:
“The Yamas & Niyamas are yoga's ten ethical guidelines and comprise the first two limbs of Yoga's eight-fold path. They are the foundation of skillful living.”
The Yamas include:
Ahimsa ~ Nonviolence
Ahimsa traditionally meant "do not kill or hurt people." This can be extrapolated to mean that we should not be violent in feelings, thoughts, words, or actions. At root, ahimsa means maintaining compassion towards yourself and others. It means being kind and treating all things with care.
Satya ~ Truthfulness
Satya means "truth," or "not lying." Practicing satya means being truthful in our feelings, thoughts, and words, and deeds. It means being honest with ourselves and with others.
Asteya ~ Nonstealing
Asteya, or "not stealing," refers to the stealing that grows from believing we cannot create what we need. We steal because we misperceive the universe as lacking abundance or we think that there is not enough for everyone and that we will not receive in proportion to our giving. Because of this, asteya does not only consist of "not stealing," but also of rooting out the subconscious beliefs of lack and scarcity that cause greed and hoarding in all their various manifestations.
Brahmacharya ~ Nonexcess
We practice brahmacharya when we consciously choose to use our life force (especially the energy of sexuality) to express our dharma, rather than to frivolously dissipate it in an endless pursuit of fleeting pleasures. Brahmacharya reminds us that our life force is both limited and precious, and sexual activity is one of the quickest ways to deplete it. As yogis, we choose to use the power behind sexuality to create, to fulfill our mission, to find and joyously express our inner selves. The practice of brahmacharya is not some archaic form of moralizing, but rather a reminder that, if we use our energy wisely, we possess the resources to live a fulfilling life.
Aparigraha ~ Nonpossessiveness
Aparigraha means not coveting what isn't ours. It is different from asteya, which asks us to avoid stealing that is motivated by a greed springing from a perceived lack of abundance. Aparigraha is the greed that is rooted in jealousy. The Mother used to say, "Jealousy is a poison that is fatal to the soul." Jealousy means that we desire to be what someone else is, or to have what someone else has. Rather than finding who we are, we look at someone else and say, "I want to be that." Aparigraha, in its essence, helps us discover our own selves so that we no longer feel the need to covet what someone else has, or be what someone else is.
The Niyamas include:
Saucha ~ Purity
Purity of body externally is promoted by good habits like bathing, brushing teeth, etc. Physical-Internal purity is realized through the practice of Asans (Postures that tone the body and remove toxins and impurities as well and eliminating tension and stress), Pranayama (Breathing exercises that cleanse and aerate the lungs, oxygenate the blood and purify the nerves), and good eating habits. More important is Mental-Internal purity. This is achieved by ridding the body of disturbing emotions like hatred, passion, delusion, anger, lust, pride and greed through the practice of Bhakti (adoration). Still more important is the cleansing of the intellect of impure thoughts which can be burned off in the fire of Svadhyaya (the study of the Self).
Santosha ~ Contentment
There will always be differences among Men. This is fine in and of itself. But when it becomes a distraction to you the mind cannot concentrate or become one-pointed and thus it is robbed of it's peace. There is contentment and peace when the flame of the spirit does not waver in the wind of desire.
Tapas ~ Self-discipline
A conscious effort to achieve ultimate union with the Divine and to burn up all desires which stand in the way of this goal. Burning effort under all circumstances to achieve a specific goal. There are three types of tapas relating to body, speech and mind. Non-violence is one example of the first category. Speaking truth and using words that do not offend are two of the tapas of speech. Developing a mental attitude whereby one remains tranquil and balanced in joy and sorrow and retains self control are tapas of the mind. Through tapas the yogi gains courage and wisdom, integrity, straightforwardness and simplicity.
Svadhyaya ~ Self-study
"Ignorance has no beginning, but it has an end. There is a beginning, but no end to knowledge." Svadhyaya is the study of the great religious books of the world, of all faiths, that the student may come to understand his own faith better.
Ishvara Pranidhana ~ Surrender
During the course of seeking enlightenment one must encounter the "dark night of the soul". This is a period when you come to question all that you thought you knew and you find yourself powerless and lost amid your desires and fears. Only now, at the darkest hour can true worship be discovered. In bhakti the mind, the intellect, and the will are surrendered to the Lord (or whatever word makes you more comfortable...a higher being)and the seeker prays: "I do not know what is good for me. Thy will be done." When the feeling of 'I' and 'mine' disappears, the individual soul has reached full growth.
When people ask me what it means I usually respond with a quick, “It’s the first 2 limbs of yoga. There are 8 in total. Google it.” As I am usually too busy to sit down and explain each point. The reaction usually goes along the lines of, “Oh you do yoga?” In Fort McMurray it usually goes along the lines of, “You must be flexible. You eat a lot of grass, hey?” Those are the responses in the G/PG13 section. Reminiscing about what the very vocal and tenacious men have said, just made me puke in my mouth a little. We won’t go there. Case in point. Here was my dilemma a couple of days ago.
Men: What is good on the menu? Best burger in your opinion?
Me: Well, I am a vegetarian, but the local favorite is the 3 game burger.
Men: You don’t eat meat? Sucks to be you. You only eat apples and lettuce, right? I’ll get the most vegetarian option then, the biggest burger with extra bacon with a side of poutine. Hold the lettuce and any veggies sweetheart. The more meat the better.
*I smile knowing that he is just about to ingest 2000cal plus of empty calories, all of which will only affect him in the long run.
Me: Sounds good. Anything to drink
Men: Coca-Cola.
Me: Alright.
Men: Whats that on your arm?
Me: Its the first 2 limbs of yoga, there are 8.
Men: You are a yoga girl, hey? Can you put your leg behind your head?
Me: No.
Men: Well then you aren’t a real yoga girl.
Me: Haha. *fake over-used smile*
Men: So hunny, you are bringing me the most cow and pig as possible?
Me: Ya, for sure.
Men: What are you doing tonight?
Me: Going to the gym and watching a movie at home.
Men: Boring yoga girl that doesn’t eat bacon. I was thinking that you could give me a private yoga lesson later on? Ill bring a salad.
Me: Yup, that’s me. *do not.....snap....*
Me: I’ll be back with your drink.
....
This was within the first 2 minutes of greeting the finest gentlemen. I won’t get into where it escalated, but need less to say my *fake smiles* where abused severely. All I wanted to do was return with his sugar-laden drink and throw it in his face while ordering him something that would most definitely assist his health. Instead, I smiled laughed and walked away, as usual.
The constant bitting of my tongue, the practice of mindfully choosing my words and how I react to those that stick to their stereotypes is on overdrive here in the “dirty mac”.
Its tested here and tested at home on all different levels, in whistler. I have only recently adopted a sense of balance of how I live my life. I am sure that this will continue to shift as things go on, but as of right now I have pushed away others notions of my choices to the side.
Yes I am a yoga teacher and athlete and yes I party hard. Yes you can find me at the gym at 6am and other times in the back bar smashing glasses. This is my balance. I am doing my best at this very moment to live a life full of experiences, good people, open-mindedness, adrenaline, love, compassion, and fun.
No I cannot put my leg behind my head and I do not care if you ride for ....!
We are all a little lost and as Julia referenced “We didn't come outta the womb with a guide book.” So be compassionate to those openly searching for their appropriate path and learn from them.
I invite you to practice open-mindfulness, to not give a shit what other people will or do think of you, and to live a life as full and wonderful and kind as possible. By saying yes to opportunities for growth and experience, coloring outside of the lines, living in the moment, and working as hard as possible to be the best YOU you can be and see fit. The only people who matter know you for you. Those are the only ones worth your time.
YOLO. All the haters are just hurting, don’t let them bring you down.
References:
hongkongyogiratpackboom.blogspot.ca
Check out Taylor's blog HERE
